Life Goes On

Last post was late March. April 3rd I gave birth to a beeeautiful lil gurl, then took three months off work. Not long enough for sure.

Every day I prayed to win the lottery so I could quit my job and stay home with the kids. I would cry while feeding the baby just thinking of leaving her.

At one point while doing just that I flipped on the tv and landed on Joyce Meyer's ministry program. She just happened to start talking about how we shouldn't be sitting on the couch flipping through channels and wishing for things to get better. How weird. The whole sermon was directed right at me. I took it to heart but haven't necessarily followed through on what I know I should do.

Last week I was so depressed, still am, about all of our debt and how it looks like we are just sinking into oblivion. Again, I was praying and wishing to win the lottery. I was up late sitting in the living room because I couldn't sleep for all of the thoughts of money ~ trying to keep my mind off it by watching mindless tv.

Eventually I went up to bed and H was asleep but the tv was on. I flipped channels a bit and landed on this other ministry show - the young thin guy who's always smiling. He seems pretty on the level. Anyway, what is he talking about??? Debt and the desparationg that one might feel in the face of it and how we shouldn't just mope around depressed about it, we have to do something about it. Get off our butts, come up with a plan, face it, and most of all have faith in God that if we take action he will help us.

Now, I just don't know what that action will be. A couple days later I finally tackled the table full of papers - mostly bills - that i have been avoiding for several months. Within there I find one of those 0% on balance transfer offers for a credit card and its not one of those crappy ones like capital one or providian. I decide I'm going to see if I can transfer some of my master card to that so I can have lower overall payments. Natch I haven't done it yet.

Ok, so I have to find a way back to the top. I can remember having no balances and paying my bills as they arrived. Even looking forward to receiving them just for the satisfaction of writing out the check and paying them off.

Now I'm here using my AFLAC payment to cover other bills instead of the medical bill its really for. STUPID!!

Wish me good fortune.

Peace