Defeat For Dinner

Until pretty recently I would have described myself as someone who loved to cook. I love to try new recipes and cook interesting, colorful, and ethnically diverse foods. It's my preference to cook as naturally as possible ~ this having stemmed from having a husband with significant food sensitivities. Some say that must be a burden, but the fact is that it makes us all much healthier to stay away from canned and boxed foods and all of the preservatives and flavor additives and colorings that go with that cooking style.

This year though I find myself increasingly depressed about and disinterested in cooking. At first the reason was pregnancy. I just hated the smell of cooking and certainly didn't want to see or touch raw meat. Once I got bigger it also became a chore to stand in the kitchen for long periods of time or to handle the backaches that came with bellying up and bending over the cutting board or sink.

At the root of it all though is loss of interest. What interested me about cooking was really pleasing people with a fabulous and interesting dinner. Everybody always likes my cooking. Everybody compliments me on the types and tastes of things I cook. Everybody except my immediate family.

Youngest - hates everything. Even if she likes it she says she hates it. So when I say we're having something in particular that I know she likes she assumes she won't like it and I have to convince her that she's always liked it. Eventually she tries it and she likes it - surprise surprise. But by then all the joy is gone from it. It's become a meal ordeal.

Oldest - has very very very limited likes. Those likes center around bread, cheese, french fries, rice, pasta, and that's about it. It's a HUGE chore to get her to eat veggies and then the limitation is corn (with lots of butter and salt); carrots (butter and salt); salad with only green leaves and she can barely choke down the thinly sliced carrots that I insist on adding; and (forcibly) green beans with lots of butter....and salt.

Hubby - well all the food sensitivies to start with. No MSG, HVP's, citric acid, pineapple or pineapple juice, wine, non-distilled vinegar, sulfites or metabisulfites, and much much more. Never wants to eat anything twice within a few days. Hates pasta. And in general, whatever it is that I'm cooking, he was hoping for something else. If I make chicken...he's eaten chicken at lunch or he was hoping for burgers. If I make mexican, he was hoping for chicken. If I grill, he's generally happy but it's pretty darn cold to grill all winter. Oh - and he pretty much hates all veggies except for corn, basic salad, and mashed potatoes.

In the end even if one of them likes it, the others complain. That's not what I want, can I have something different, I hate that, etc.

So, I'm just sick of it. I've reached a point where I don't want to cook for them. I love to cook for people who appreciate the effort of it all. I have no interest in cooking for people who are only going to focus on what this meal "isn't" for them.

I worry about my kids getting proper nutrition. Especially the oldest isn't getting probably even 10% of the fruits and veggies she should. She only like bananas, and gets sick of those after a while. She only liked one kind of apple which is only available during the fall and early winter. 100's of other fruits out there and she won't eat any of them.

The veggies she does eat, she eats grudgingly and they typically aren't the ones with the greatest benefit (green lettuce, or corn). Then she only eats them with butter and salt.

I am thankful that I can get my youngest to eat quite a variety. She'll eat total veggie pizza - tomatoes, spinach, carmelized onions, roasted peppers, etc. She LOVES avacadoes. She likes asparagus (although only with mayo and only if it's cooked just so). She loves broccoli, but only with cheese sauce. She'll even eat sweet taters.

When I was a kid it grossed me out to see veggies - even potatoes - smothered with butter and sauces and salt. I liked them fresh and crisp and plain. I still do. My mom and sister ate everything with oodles of butter and salt and sr. cream. ICK! Ok, I did learn to like taters with butter and sr. cream, but I still like them w/out as well. Thankfully my mom did have an adventurous appetite so I guess I take after her in terms of trying different things - she didn't cook different things, but she would eat them.

I'm at my wits end. I don't know what to do or what to cook anymore. Nothing is right, nothing is good enough. I have fabulous cookbooks but have to edit so much out of every recipe that there's no longer any fun in trying any of them. I have no motivation any more. If one person likes it, two won't. Or they'll pick all the most nutritious parts out of the meal.

How am I supposed to cook for my family, keep them healthy, encourage good nutritional habits, if I hate to cook anymore??

It's a conundrum.